When you love and accept yourself, you don’t need approval from others.
A friend said she saw someone on YouTube who said he was coming out to the world. He said that the world is very judgmental and not accepting of people in that lifestyle. He was searching for love and acceptance.
There are so many people that are trying to find themselves. It is not just during those awkward teen years. There are many adults that are trying to figure out who they are and what they want. They are trying to find their purpose for being on the earth. In this process they are searching for validation. They have the need to feel affirmed. I know because I was one of them. I sought that approval from without because I did not find it from within. The problem with that is people are fickle. They will support and encourage you one day and then act like they do not know you the next. Others may not be intentional about it, but in their humanity, they may not be there during your time of need. Though outside encouragement is good, if you seek that as the only means of affirmation then your emotions will be in for a roller coaster ride. That is why it is so important, like the song says, to “love the one you are with.” Yet, I am not talking about anyone else but yourself. Friends and even family may go. But as long as you are alive, you will always have “Me, Myself, and I.”
So, it is a fine time for you to start to get to know yourself. It Is time for you to go on a date with yourself. It may seem taboo and even feel strange at first but go out to eat alone. Go to the movies. Spend one on one time getting to know you; seeing what makes you tick. In the early stages of dating everything is fun and new. You ask many questions as you try to get to know the other person. However, as time goes on and you go deeper, you see the good sides as well as the bad. The only difference is, when you are dating someone else, if you do not like that person, you can end the relationship. You cannot and should not end the relationship with yourself. I repeat, you should not end the relationship with yourself. But the positive side is, you have 100% of the power and ability to change yourself. You are in control of you. If you don’t like something, do something about it. Change it. These days, with plastic surgery and liposuction, at the right price, you can change just about anything. Everything has a cost but if you work hard enough you can pay the price.
The time is now for you to accept yourself. Love yourself. Date yourself. According to the late, great Whitney, that is where the greatest love of all resides anyway…inside of you.
Below are questions you can ask to get you started as you begin the dating process.
1. Who has been the biggest influence in your life?
2. What kinds of things really make you laugh?
3. What’s your favorite place in the entire world?
4. Who is your best friend? What do you like about him/her?
5. Favorite movie of all time? Why so?
6. What’s your biggest goal in life right now?
7. What is your favorite way to spend a Saturday?
8. Do you have any pet peeves?
9. What was your family like growing up?
10. What were you like as a kid?
11. Who was your favorite schoolteacher or college professor? Why?
12. Have you figured out your calling in life? What is it?